Personality Disorders Community Check-in: February 27th–March 5th
Hello, PD Support Community!
Image source
💜 What have you been thinking about lately?
💜 What is something that's happened recently that's surprised you? (Can be a good surprise or a bad surprise 😊)
If you prefer not to answer these questions, feel free to say hello, ask for a hug, or share anything else that's on your mind. 💜
If you would like to be added or removed from the taglist, click hereTaglist: @Adeline12345 @adventurousCat7477 @AlfAndthemachine @alleywood13 @Alwaysinpyjamas @ambitiousVase1322 @amicableDime9946 @AndreaDawn @arbanon @ARC80 @AspenCade@AutumnLauren6 @autumnthemoth @Avocado22 @azuladragon34 @b4Damion @BaggageClaim @berrymimi @bestcase @Blue123456618 @blueAngel00 @caringPerspective41 @CheerySandi @ChristmasGift @courageousPond1835 @crang17 @crimsonPlane2738 @cyanPlatypus6370 @dagaz13th @DamagedOne13 @daydreammemories @dberryy @diamondintheROUGH2022 @DIDisaythat @DoggoMom @ebonyyyblondie89 @EddaLayla @emerijourney @EmmaSwan18 @EmotionalNerd @Everythingisbetterinyourpyjamas @fearlessOcean2254 @fearlessSouth4632 @fireyseastar97 @FloweringBunny @forcefulFriend4768 @FreakFactor7 @generousEyes493 @Glue @Goldcherry2113 @GRAPSPRO2033 @GreenScarab @Hadeel96 @HashiramaNinja @Healing0Pillow @healingHeart1111 @heartycitrus @HopeandFaith @Hyacinth22 @IdolPigment @ImaginativePenny152 @imclover @indigoCup1959 @intelligentWheel627 @Irishrose78 @itsmeow @Jasminerice @Jish07541 @JoniGirl @Jupiterbeingahuman @JusticiaPrimalDorogo @JustSophia @K87 @kindTurtle3738 @LabeledBPD @LadyNikita @LavenderFlower @learningtolovemyself @Lemino @LightsFromDark @Lilac4Roses @LiliTwolsky @limeRaspberries2286 @lovelyWords13 @LoveTracker @maple23 @MeeshyRB @MelG919 @missg @Mkmultra @munchiegoosie @nervoussmiles @NightshadeVenom @Nubia87 @OneErased @optimisticMagic0014 @OrangePeel24 @Oxymoron6demon @passionateJackfruit5095 @Piggy @placidShade4261 @Pointlesswords @Psalm139 @QueenBee03 @QueenSerenity5 @QuietMagic @racqueldawn @raininglillies13 @raspberryWatermelon7195 @rationalGrapefruitq @Red789 @RelaxedPanda @RemorseCode2 @Rex0911 @RoadLessTraveled @runaway101 @SadBlueEyes @selfdisciplinedBunny232 @ShyCat1678201 @SilverSeastar @Sleepwalkermw @SnaryPoppins07 @spectacularCandy9984 @Stardew3 @Starilus @StrangeKat @sunflower2480 @Tamy4210 @Tatianaalize @tohealthemoon @toucans @Triscups @Twigo7 @uniqueRose1689 @versatilePomegranate60 @WalkingCrow @witchyyrose @Xe
@QuietMagic Thank you so much for doing these check-ins for the community we have here! ♡ It's greatly appreciated.
💜 What have you been thinking about lately?
Honestly, I've been thinking about what I want to buy myself. I've taken care of others and keep putting off on things I need or want... well, aside from food. 😂
💜 What is something that's happened recently that's surprised you? (Can be a good surprise or a bad surprise 😊)
My most recent surprise was seeing a sibling I haven't seen in quite some time.
@YourCaringConfidant
Hey, thanks for the appreciation!
Yeah, you're allowed to buy things, lol. I do the same thing (minus the taking care of others... nobody gets taken care of 😊). I would run out of fingers if I had to count the number of times I've had the following conversation:
Friend/family: What would you like for [holiday, birthday, etc.]?
Me: I don't know, I have everything I need
Friend/family: 🙄 That's not helpful
How did things go with seeing the sibling?
@QuietMagic
What have you been thinking about lately?
been thinking about what makes a good friend. we just end a friendship of almost 8yrs it hard but has us questioning what makes a good friend. this person was we believe a toxic friend. she was demanding our time and crossing every boundary' we made. but we did not really see this. also we wanted to be kind to her. we do care about her a lot. but she was getting angry with us over things she wanted. when she did not get them she threatened to be done with us as friends. so she did this again last weekend. we was very sick still sick. we texted her on sat also talked to her on phone. at 11:05pm sat we texted and said we not most likely text or answer calls on sunday. due to being sick we be sleeping.
so sunday we get text late afternoon was at least you can take a min text me. think i done with you as you not texting or answering my phone calls. well we texted back that we was done if she felt that way. she said more in her text we did in our text too. but we talked this over both with therapist offline and one online too. both agreed we should end friendship. we have mixed feeling right now about this all. it what we been thinking about a lot.
What is something that's happened recently that's surprised you? (Can be a good surprise or a bad surprise
talking to my dad on phone tonight. he let us know my sister in law had a heart attack and had stent put in. she year younger then us. so was a surprise to us. we not talk to anyone in family but dad and that only on phone. it sad but whole family believes everyone reads face book many many times a day. so they post everything on face book. so due to we not go on face book much we not know what going on with family.
Yeah, that's a big change to have someone who's a friend for 8 years and then suddenly they're not a friend anymore. And can understand what you're saying of "if this was someone I thought was a good friend and things turned out to not work, what makes someone a good friend?" Glad to hear that the therapists you spoke with agreed with your intuition that the friendship needed to end.
A couple thoughts that come to mind for me:
- You might be a different person now than you were 8 years ago, and your expectations have shifted. Things that you were okay with before now feel like they don't work. Maybe your understanding of what you need for a sustainable friendship has shifted as you've evolved yourself recently.
- I wonder if some of the qualities that made them someone who you became friends with might have also contributed to things not working now. I know I've personally had friendships where I got along really well with someone because they had certain mental health issues, and it was sort of double-edged. They'd be understanding, open-minded, empathetic, etc. around things that I was experiencing, often in ways that nobody else was. But then if things went wrong, they'd also go horribly wrong in ways that I didn't experience with other people. 😊
Sorry to hear about your sister-in-law!
@QuietMagic
thank you we believe part of reason friendship had to end was she got mental illnesses too and family issues. but she not really working on healing at all. she uses her past to make excuses for her actions now a lot. also but her issues onto others. so yes as we heal we see things we need to change about us. we made appoint to change them into healthier ways. so yes we not same person we was 8yrs ago at all.
also she when issues come up even health ones if a negative thing could happen. she will not want others to talk about that only the positive out comes. she say i not want to go there. so for us that was like a big red flag in friendship. also she talks about what wrong with how she treated by family, but never does anything about it.
we did not really know how to use boundaries 8 years ago. but now we starting to use them more and more in healthy ways. so yes a lot of changes we made over last 8 years. she seem stuck in her stuff unwilling to work on true healing.
thank you for your input into this as helped a lot too
@QuietMagic
What have you been thinking about lately?
my studies and finding a part time job
💜 What is something that's happened recently that's surprised you? (Can be a good surprise or a bad surprise 😊)
i prefer not say xd
@daydreammemories
Ooh, I don't recall hearing about the part-time job search before. Hope that goes well. 😊
That is okay--wouldn't be great if people were forced to answer something just because I ask a question. 💜
@QuietMagic
yeah.. i just decided it a couple of days ago, and thank you for your understanding!
