I Feel Ostracized, Alienated, and Alone
Ok First, I just want to say that I haven’t been on 7 Cups for a while, and I was surprised to see that there is a men’s issues section. I feel compelled to come here and talk about my feelings since I am a man, and I believe that many of the issues I’m experiencing stem from that fact. I have a lot on my chest that I don’t feel comfortable expressing on any other platform. It really bothers me that I’ve come back to this mental health platform, 7 Cups, which I consider to be garbage, but I don’t have anywhere else to turn to so it is what it is, I guess.
I feel ostracized, alienated, and alone. I don’t have any friends and struggle to make them in the first place. I don’t have a good history with friendships either, and on top of that, I’m going through family issues as well. I really don’t feel like I have anyone I can turn to-anyone I feel comfortable or safe confiding in. There’s no one I truly trust. I have no sense of companionship, which is one of the reasons I turned to online platforms and social media (mostly ***) in search of connection or friendship. Unfortunately, I haven’t had any luck or good experiences there either. I’ve run into a lot of toxicity, negative people, and harmful atmospheres, and I think it’s only worsened my mental state. It’s reached a point where I even feel threatened when I do get a response or feedback from someone.
Whenever I try to establish a friendship online, it doesn’t lead anywhere. I’m tired of always being the initiator putting in effort and getting nothing in return. It feels like no one is putting in the same work I am, and nobody cares enough to check in on me or see if I’m okay, and I know I can’t be exaggerating either cause if I were a woman I would get people calling and texting me without me even asking wanting to talk like how both my Mom and Aunt receive. Something that I’ve noticed. The truth is, I’m not okay. I’ve been dealing with nothing but problems and nonsense for a very long time now, and even therapy doesn’t seem to be working or helping. I hate this.
As a man, I feel like I have no place in society no sense of belonging or connection anywhere.
As for women, I haven’t had good experiences with them either. I do not trust women at all and am very wary of them. At this point, I don’t want to be lumped in with the actions of other men simply because of my gender. Both online and offline, I constantly hear that men are the problem that everything wrong with society is men’s fault. That men are the root cause of all evil. Somehow, it’s all MY FAULT!. I didn’t choose or ask to be male. Women didn’t ask to be born female either, right? So why should that be held against me?
I have done nothing wrong to women. I have never acted with bad intent toward them. In fact, I go out of my way to avoid them. And honestly, I’d recommend that any man do the same. If you’re a man, just being near a woman is enough to make them uncomfortable. Just standing next to them is enough to make you a threat in their eyes. That’s how it feels. Society demonizes and vilifies me simply for existing as a man. Because of this, I avoid women whenever possible.
But it’s getting to the point where I’m completely fed up and sick of women entirely. I feel like I’m drowning in an empty void, and I don’t know if I can crawl back from it. I’m just sick and tired of everything at this point.
@TerryTHEwonderer
It is not you. This is happening to too many people IMO.
I say that as the finding friends online of off becomes a chore if we are the person contacting and starting conversations. It is caused by those who seem to like to cause division. You are RIGHT people are all held to the actions of others in whatever group a person may be in .... male/ female, age/ generation, even nationality.
people who are out there that can be friends are harder to find because they feel like you have described and feel it is not worth it.
@TerryTHEwonderer Hey, I’m sorry you’re struggling with social interaction. The internet doesn’t exactly encourage building healthy relationships. Our societies are, unfortunately a reflection of the internet, I think. So you’re in a tough position. I’m not going to say your world view is wrong, but it may not be serving you. For instance, you say a woman feels threatened if you even go near her. That’s your assumption. You don’t know what’s going on in her head. Certainly if you bring your world view with you when you stand by her, your body language will speak volumes. You may be creating the response you don’t want.
@TerryTHEwonderer
I fully understand the "men are the source of all evil" part of your story. And I believe such a "gender racism" should be totally banned from any public debate. Unfortunately, some (anti)social media gladly promote such attitudes.
There might be some powers in this world who want society to be depopulated, divided, deprived, depreciated and dumber.
However, the fact that something is said on TV is not making it true, there are still lots of people who don't buy this narrative, like women who oppose to promoting anti-male attitudes.
And most people are just good people, who do not care about political correctness, mental fashions or ideologies. We are all humans, and our gender, race or income are secondary things.
